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I has a nemesis!

Yes, dear readers, it was inevitable that, sooner or later, the mischief and mockery of a certain Monkey King would come to the attentions of some Crunch Overlord. That day has come, and my nemesis is none other than the Chatty DM. He is a master of Crunchy Magic, he disparages Flavor and Fluff and Setting and All That is Good and True!

Clearly, he must die.

Fortunately, he has fallen prey to the weakness of many a villain; he's revealed his hand too early, sending his minions on the attack in an earlier comment thread.

I need trickery and capers to defeat his unyielding, mechanical minions. I need ninjas, pirates, and plot twists to outwit the Chatty DM — more scenery, more marvels, more gaming elements unconstrained by Petty Rules! Victory Will Be Mine! I am enjoying this Far Too Much!!1!

Oh, and after all that disparagement of Fluff, he admits to liking Planescape. I sense a plot twist where the Crunch Overlord finally repents and Sees the Light. Either that, or I imbezulate him with my Electro-Cannons.


Oct. 13th, 2007 10:12 pm (UTC)
Just so you don't grow too confident
Dear Nemesis, while I'm working on my next offensive, I though I'd send you a little CR-inadequate Challenge your way:

A Thirty-Headed Tarrasque!!!!

Fluff your way out of that one 'dear friend'!

Mwa Ha Ha Ha!!!!!
Oct. 14th, 2007 04:11 pm (UTC)
Re: Just so you don't grow too confident
Yeah, that thing has a lot of heads. Hmmmm. Electo-cannons aren't enough, how sad.

I guess the easy answer is just to send a crawling head army after it (since they *EAT HEADS*), but maybe that's too simple.

The complicated way to get out in story terms is to mention the 30-Headed Tarrasques' *one weakness*. Could be the way those heads always argue among themselves, leaving other creatures alone. Could be moving to a different rules set entirely, say one with spine-mounted disintegrator cannons (Traveller) or anything with atomics.

The great thing about story/fluff is that the rules can be ignored to bend the flavor to your will. For instance, it's really unfortunate the way that all 30-Headed Tarrasques turn against their owners when hit with atomic weapons. Just the way that the Frankenstein monster became enraged by fire...
Oct. 15th, 2007 01:20 am (UTC)
Re: Just so you don't grow too confident
Ah dear Mr. Baur, spoken like a true master of the intangible! While all you say is very true on the face of the words themselves, I must point to a most fatal flaw in your arguments!

While flavor can be used to flaunt the very nature of the laws of crunchiness, therein lies a conundrum for Fluff.... You need to use it in such a way that it will marry itself to the existing crunch or you risk breaking several ties with one's suspension of disbelief...

There are exceptions, and the Rule of Cool seems to be one of them. Pray tell, do help me explore the other ones but I doubt you'll move this shriveled Overlord's heart...

Thread carefully dear Mr. Baur, for while Kobolds might be swayed by the soft music of originality and character development and while multi-headed menace may be confounded in attacking their progenitor... the non-mechanical reasons for doing so must overcome the inertia and often too-important weight that are the rules that support one's reality.

Until me meet again!

(Thanks for playing along Wolfgang, this is fun... I'll compile the number of crazy rules abuses I found into a 'things not to be done with the rules' post in the following days)

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